Below is a recent exchange between Karin and a neighbour:
First, Karin wrote:
I had a cheery little greeting this morning....I was on the internet and heard my clothes rack fall over - BANG - or is it CRASH? Anyway, I said, "Oh hell, there goes the clothes rack", and went to pick it up.
Well, if God had not pushed the rack over, I would have NEVER known a HUGE cockroach was sunning himself on the garden wall. He was definitely a BIGGIE. I called "himself" (Irish for the man in your life) to come and look, and my protector offered to go chase it with a broom! Can you imagine, all my life (or so it seems) I have been WAITING for my knight in shining armor....and what do I go and say? "God, I don't want you to chase it, KILL it!"
And I went into the kitchen, snatched my green bottle of poison spray...charged past my knight in shining armor (well, he really was blurry eyed and wearing a flannel plaid bathrobe and scratching)...but never mind...I charged past, left him in my dust, and confronted the huge dragon and killed him MYSELF! He seemed sort of slow, but once the spray hit him (like a barrage of bullets), he made an attempt to fall off the wall and bury himself in the mulch! But I knew he was dying, because I heard him gasping for air as he fell out of sight!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, my knight was wondering if it was something he said, or what? He was still standing there yawning, when I strove past, chest high in self pride, snide smile, and said, "There, no chasing, just kill 'em" as I put my six shooter back in my cupboard!
What is the moral of this story? Not sure, but did want to let you know that the COCKROACHES are out there, so be prepared!
Then the neighbour responded:
Let us tell you as story.
Once upon a time there was a handsome (Greek) prince who was about to be turned into a frog by his wicked stepmother who dabbled in sorcery. As she only dabbled in sorcery and because the location was Greece where they don't have many frogs she accidentally turned him into a cockroach.
The handsome prince knew that the only way to break the spell was to be kissed by a beautiful princess but owing to the fact that the Greeks had by now done away with the monarchy there was a definite shortage of princesses of any kind.
Then one day he heard of the ravishing Swamp woman who was indeed a princess and named Queen of the internet. This fair lady was imprisoned in a SMOKEY dungeon by the black prince who she mistakenly thought was her knight in shining armor. (Inside jokes: Our house sits above low-lying ground; Karin Googles everything for everyone; and on New Year’s Day our fireplace would not draw due to lack of wind.)
The moral of this story is not to take things at face value. You should have shot the prince and kissed the cockroach!
The Wizards of Alyki
Editor’s comment: It is a good thing that I have a thick skin.